Flexin’ Friday – May 26, 2017

The struggle. 

That’s basically my whole week in two words. The struggle was real. If you’re sick of posts about my leg – stop reading now. If you are interested in what I deal with on a daily basis – keep reading. 

Monday night I was ready to chop my leg off and sell the titanium in my leg and move on with my life. 

The week prior to Monday I have been doing a few exercises to get my mobility back and even myself out. The hero pose absolutely kills me. I will be in pain for hours after I do it. Usually the pain would last a few minutes, I’ll take a few deep breaths and move on. Not the hero pose. Of course on Monday we did the hero pose to warm up. Then we jumped rope, which also aggregates my leg. But after the workout I just need a few minutes to collect myself and it doesn’t hurt. 

Monday night I played three softball games. I knew I was in for a world of hurt because at 2pm my leg was already killing me. My coach gave me some directions for relief but it lasted about two innings into my first game. If there was any glimmer of hope the whole week it was when I was on the field. When girls are up to bat, the outfield usually moves in because honestly girls just don’t hit it as far as guys do. When I got up to bat I saw the center fielder was basically in the infield and laughed. Even prior to the last three months of really focusing on my diet and gym I would have smacked it over his head. I also was in the bottom of the order, sooo can’t really blame him for moving in. I ripped it, with the help of the wind, right over his head. My teammates asked what steroids I was on, joked I had to take give a urine sample, and gave me numerous complements. That’s what I worked for. It made the endless burpees worth it. I also out ran two infield hits to be safe at first. YES. I out ran infield hits to be safe at first. You read that right. 

The last game, my fielding came into play. There was a short blooper hit that I had to sprint to in order to catch. I got it, I couldn’t believe it was in my mit. If I wasn’t in such shock for that split second I probably would have a double play. I heard the girls on the other bench say “Why is she so good?” Again, the endless burpees making it all worth it. I got home around 930pm and didn’t even want to get out of my car my leg hurt so much. I iced it, took pain pills, and went to bed. 

Tuesday, I look at the workout and it’s running. I was in so much pain, I almost didn’t go, but I did. Again, in a world of hurt after the workout – I had a mini break down, more so at home than at the gym. Especially because I knew I would be on my feet ALL day at work. My coach had to remind me of some things. 1. How much work I really did on my leg the past two days. Yes, I worked my ass off.  2. How far I’ve really come and how I would have never been able to do this a year ago. I probably would have skipped both workouts on Monday and Tuesday. 3. I’m getting better and I’m in pain because I’m finally using my leg the right way. This was a tough one for me to understand. Still kind of hard. I look it as you’ll get worse before you get better. 4. I suffered a traumatic injury. Eye roll. 

Personally, I hate number 4. Other people suffer traumatic injuries and are fine. Why can’t I be fine too. Ugh. 

Wednesday wasn’t much better. I was on my feet all day at work. By the end of my shift I was ready to chop my leg off again. 

I don’t want to go through this the rest of my life. So I’ve made the decision to buckle up now so I don’t have to do it in the future. Give it all that I have so I can be better. If this is where I am now and I’m still not 100%, everyone better watch out. And I’m sure if I ever get close to 100% – I’ll have new goals ready to crush. Right now my focus is on getting my leg to where it needs to be. I wish I would have realized this sooner but I was too wrapped up in feeling bad for myself. 

That’s all I have for today. Hopefully next week is better for me mentally and physically but if it isn’t I’ll have to crush it. I’m ready. 

Follow and like my blog post and follow all my social media. ❤️ see you Monday. 


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